If you believe in vampires today, you’re labelled as crazy, a freak, or one of the more aggressive fans to the Twilight Saga. But this wasn’t true 500 years ago. Such belief was positively mundane. Especially in Europe. And a recent archeological dig in Bulgaria offers further evidence of this fact.
Archive for Vampire
Lyle Monroe Bensley, a 19 year-old resident of Galveston, Texas, was arrested last Saturday after alledgedly breaking into a young woman’s home. According to reports, he hissed and screeched at the woman, then attempted to bite her neck. The young woman called police after he fled, clambering over several fences and yelling that “didn’t want to have to feed on humans”. When apprehended, he told police he was a 500 year-old vampire, and that they should restrain him because he needed to feed.
He’s currently in county lock-up for attempted assault and burglary. And apparently he was at least initially restrained for his own safety.
A dental worker wrote to The Answer B!tch asking why “the vampires’ fangs are on their laterals and not their cuspids?” Claiming this didn’t make sense and it was “driving [her] crazy”.
Surprisingly, rather than laughing, she offers this detailed answer:
First of all, you should know that vampires have a long history of arbitrary fang placement. True. Yes. It goes back at least as far as the 1922 classic Nosferatu, whose main monster looked like a carnivorous mole rat thanks to a pair of fangs where his two front incisors should have been.
And don’t forget 30 Days of Night; every single monster tooth was a pointy, deadly little corn nugget. Yes, the classic Christopher Lee Dracula character featured a pair of stabby cuspids—as did Blackula—but as you can see, super-sharp cuspids are far from de rigueur among fashionable creatures of the night.
So why might True Blood show creator Alan Ball have favored lateral incisor enhancement? Well, this is what he told NPR’s Dave Davies last year:
“We created fangs that actually lie flat along the roof of the mouth and then click into place when a vampire is in danger or aroused or ready to feed, much like a rattlesnake’s fangs click into place. Then we put the fangs not with the four front teeth between them, but with only two because it worked better for the physiology of the rattlesnake, the snake fang working.
“And I like that, because it looks a little different. It doesn’t look like the classic thing.” See? Vampire science and all that.
Hmmm … TMI on the vamp fang placement. Or as the kidz are saything these days: TL/DR.
After their bass player Jennifer (Jessica Paré) becomes a vampire, down and out rock band, The Winners are launched into the spotlight. But when they find themselves stalked by creepy producers, wild groupies and the legendary vampire hunter Eddie Van Helsig (Malcolm McDowell), The Winners soon find fame to be a fate worse than death.
How can you not warm to a movie that opens its trailer with a close-up of Iggy Pop?